Earlier this month, I was contacted by the organization Mesothelioma Hope with information on the resources they provide for families impacted by cancer. According to their website:
"Mesothelioma Hope is a trusted resource that provides accurate information about mesothelioma symptoms, treatment options, and free support resources. We aim to ensure patients and their families have the information, guidance, and assistance they need to find hope and healing."
They asked if I would be open to sharing their resources on an existing blog post, and instead I invited them to serve as a guest writer and create a new blog dedicated to sharing their resources. After reviewing their article, I can definitely say that the advice they share here is applicable to really any difficult conversation, but is definitely helpful when parents are tasked with sharing a cancer diagnosis with a child.
Breaking the news to a child that a loved one has cancer, like mesothelioma, can be one of the most challenging conversations one might ever have. Given the delicate nature of this subject, it is essential to strike a balance between being honest and being sensitive to a child's emotions and comprehension level.
Here are some steps and tips to consider:
1. Choose the Right Setting: Find a quiet, comfortable place where the child feels safe and free to express emotions. The environment should be one where there are minimal distractions.
2. Use Simple and Clear Language: Depending on the child's age and understanding, use straightforward language. Avoid medical jargon that might confuse them. Instead of saying Malignant tumor, you might say, There's a sickness inside that shouldn’t be there;
3. Be Honest but Reassuring: It's important to be truthful about the diagnosis, but also provide reassurance. Grandma is sick right now, and the doctors are doing their best to help her get better.
4. Allow Them to Ask Questions: Give your child the opportunity to ask any questions they might have. They might wonder if the loved one will be okay, if they can still visit, or if it's contagious. Answer as truthfully as you can, but also in a way that they can understand.
5. Validate Their Feelings: Every child will react differently. Some may cry, others may be silent, and some might even seem indifferent. Whatever their reaction, let them know that it's okay to feel that way. It's okay to feel sad, scared, or even angry about this.
6. Offer Comfort: Physical comfort, like a hug or holding hands, can be very reassuring for a child. Let them know that you're there for them, and together, as a family, you'll navigate through this challenging time.
7. Update Them Regularly: As the situation progresses, keep the child updated in terms they can understand. If the loved one starts treatment, loses hair, or even starts feeling better, let the child know. This prevents them from being shocked or confused by sudden changes.
8. Involve Them in Supportive Activities: Depending on the child's age and willingness, involve them in activities that can be supportive. Drawing a card, making a simple bracelet, or even just spending time with the loved one can make a difference.
9. Consider Seeking External Support: Sometimes, children benefit from talking to someone outside the family, like a counselor or therapist, especially if they're struggling with the news.
10. Remember Your Feelings Too: As an adult, you might also be grappling with a roller coaster of emotions. Ensure you're taking care of your mental and emotional well-being, seeking support when necessary. Telling a child about a loved one's cancer diagnosis is never easy. It requires patience, understanding, and a lot of love. By ensuring open communication, providing consistent support, and making space for their feelings, you can help the child cope in the best way possible.
For those diagnosed with mesothelioma, Mesothelioma Hope serves as a reliable source offering precise details on symptoms, available treatments, and complimentary support tools. Our goal is to equip patients and their loved ones with the necessary knowledge, direction, and aid to discover a path to hope and recovery.
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